Oliver is almost a week old!

At 12:16am, Oliver will be one week old. It's amazing how fast a week has gone. The days tend to blend together right now since we're not on a normal sleep schedule. The first two nights home, Oliver was fantastic. He was a bit fussy at the hospital so we were nervous he'd be the same way here. But he was great and we thought he just felt comfortable and safe at his new home. We even started telling people how lucky we were that our little guy was a good sleeper! Definitely jinxed ourselves on that one... The past two nights have been a little crazy. He is super fussy and the only thing that calms him down is to breastfeed, and he needs it almost every hour. We can't imagine he's actually hungry but he won't take the pacifier, and no amount of swaddling, bouncing, rocking or singing will help calm him down. So we put him on the boob, and he is good to go. Sometimes it knocks him out, other times he's wide awake. But if he does fall asleep, it's for 45 minutes to an hour, max. And the next morning, it's like he finally gives in and sleeps for a few hours. This morning he finally fell asleep at 7:30, and I woke up at 10:30 feeling refreshed. It's amazing how little sleep I can run on right now! Even though it's been a bit of an emotional roller coaster, it's so worth it. John and I have been very honest with each other, expressing our fears and admitting how we REALLY feel about things. I'm not ashamed to say that I've said more than once that I miss our old life, and how easy it was just the two of us. John feels frustrated that he can't soothe his crying baby, and that it's up to me to stay up all night and comfort him. There are so many things running through our minds, but then Oliver will open his eyes and stare at us and all we can do is coo over how cute he is, and how amazing our life is now. We wouldn't trade this in for anything, and each day it gets better. Each day he feels like less of an intruder and more a part of our family. John reminded me today that not only are we getting to know him, but he's still getting to know us. We have to continue to have patience and remind each other that the rough nights will soon become a thing of the past. We'll experience all sorts of other crazy things (can't wait until he starts teething!!!!) but if we can get through this, we can do anything. All I know is that I feel so blessed to be married to such a strong man who is not afraid to admit when he is scared or frustrated or overwhelmed, but can still love and nurture as if nothing was wrong. Thank God for our families, who are always here for us whether in person or through emails and texts, to tell us they love us and are thinking about us. And our friends who check in on us, ask if we need anything, offer to bring dinner, or just tell us how cute our kid is :) We are fortunate that my milk supply is plentiful and that my body is healing extremely well from the cesarean, so I have the food to nurture and sooth my baby and the energy to do so. We are so lucky and know things could be a lot worse in many different ways. No matter how many weird thoughts come and go, the one thing we know is that we can't imagine life without Oliver!

Taking a nap in his crib!