Videos of Oliver are now private

I made all of our videos private today after realizing they weren't, so please email me if you'd like the password to view them!

Big boy in a big bed!

Big boy in a big bed from Lindsay Zogas on Vimeo.

Big boy in a big bed #2 from Lindsay Zogas on Vimeo.

We propped Oliver up in our bed tonight and just watched him for awhile... That kid is so entertaining!

3 weeks old + first time bottle = a weepy Mama!

The nurses at Providence, Dr. Bengtson and our lactation consultant all said to give a bottle between 3 and 4 weeks, as that's the best time in a newborns life to try something new. So we wasted no time giving it a try today as Oliver turned 3 weeks old! John sat with him in the glider and the kid took the bottle instantly. I almost burst into tears... Our baby is getting so big! And I'm so glad John gets to experience this, too. I get to bond with Oliver so much during our multiple nursing sessions each day and want John to have that time with him as well. Now let's just hope he doesn't have any trouble going back to the breast at the next feeding!

Bye bye umbilical cord stump!

Just now as I was changing Oliver's diaper, his umbilical cord stump fell off! What a big boy :)

Merry Christmas!

Love the Zogas Family

A smile caught on camera!

After shoving the camera in Oliver's face several times today, we caught a smile in action. And of course, my voice reached several octaves higher as I squealed in excitement at such an event! This kid makes us so damn happy.

Smiles caught on camera from Lindsay Zogas on Vimeo.

Thank God for the Moby wrap

I finally figured out how to wear the Moby wrap today and got Oliver in there safe & snug... He cried for about 20 seconds, then fell asleep! This thing is incredible. He loves to be close when falling asleep, so I have a feeling this is our new best friend. Check us out in action:

Oliver's 2-week check up

Yesterday we brought the little man to Dr. Bengtson's office for his 2-week visit! John and I were looking forward to this because we had lots of questions. Oliver has been doing really well, but there are just a few things we're concerned about. The other day he was super fussy all day long and wanted to nurse every 30-45 minutes. I thought he was getting sick, but Dr. B said some days may just be like that. Also we wanted to ask about newborn acne since Oliver has it, and it's so sad but should clear up in a few weeks... Some babies keep it for months, but I'm realllly hoping that's not the case! It looks like a rash, but Dr. B said it's not. Other than that, the biggest issue we're facing is that the kiddo isn't gaining weight. We saw a lactation consultant named Stephanie this past Saturday for some help and discovered since Oliver's last weigh in on 12/11, he had only gained 2 ounces. Right now he should be gaining .5 to 1 ounce a day. Right away I felt extremely guilty, thinking I had been doing something really wrong. Stephanie was quick to assure me it's not my fault but it could be a poor latch or my milk supply. I know I have an abundant milk supply (I pumped 10 ounces from one breast the other day in under 20 minutes) so it had to be something else. We worked on his latch and we left the appointment a couple hours later feeling very confident that he'd gain some weight before our doctor appointment. Well, unfortunately Oliver stayed at 8 lbs, 13.5 oz (50th percentile for weight) over 2 days. Dr. Bengtson said he's not totally concerned since Oliver started out at such a healthy weight, but wants us to check in with Stephanie again this week and come back next week for another weigh-in and to make sure everything really is ok. He did grow another inch and a quarter and is now 22.75" long (which puts him in the 95th percentile for height!), so there's always the possibility the kid is gaining weight but is getting taller so you don't see it?? Who knows. We might try feeding him a bottle of pumped milk each day to make sure he's in fact getting enough milk, since we can't measure what he takes in breastfeeding. I'm hoping he'll take the bottle without any issues! Despite all of this, Dr. B said Oliver looks like a million bucks and that we're doing a great job. We're slowly figuring this child out and each day feel more normal! It's been challenging, and exhausting, but it's getting better. Last night was definitely the best night we've had since coming home from the hospital, thanks to John... Every night he's asked me if we can put Oliver to sleep in his crib. I've struggled with this idea because it just feels SO far away from our bedroom. I know, it's like 10 feet away... But come on, you want me to put my newborn baby in a DIFFERENT room?!?! What if he cries and we can't hear him? Aaah! No way. However, the child naps extremely well in his crib during the day, so it could only make sense that he'd so well in it overnight. Since we got home with him, we've kept in in our room and tried several things– a nice wood bassinet we borrowed from a friend, a moses basket on the floor, a snuggle nest in our bed, and snuggling him in bed against my chest. He'd go to sleep in the bassinet but would wake up all the time fussing and wanting to be picked up. The moses basket is too small, the snuggle nest is too big for our bed so John and I couldn't sleep well (even though the baby did, kinda), as well as having him snuggled against my body. I put a blanket under his head so he couldn't move and suffocate but it just felt a little too dangerous, and I didn't sleep well because I was so paranoid I'd squish him! When John asked me over and over again if we could put him in the crib, I knew we should give it a try but couldn't imagine sleeping well with him in a different room. Well guess what? Last night we slept so peacefully, and so did Oliver. He woke up twice during the night for feedings (and we heard him cry just fine!), and then went back to bed in his crib for a few more hours. It was weird not having him close by, but we needed good sleep, and so did he! We're hoping he continues to sleep well in his crib... So many people have told me just when you get yourselves in a routine, the baby changes his mind about what he likes and dislikes. At least for now I feel good after a good night's sleep!!

Tummy time!

Tummy time from Lindsay Zogas on Vimeo.

Oliver likes the guitar!

I don't have as much time to blog these days, obviously, but will try to post videos more often. This morning John played guitar for Oliver and he was so content! We're hoping we have a musician on our hands :)

Daddy playing guitar for Oliver from Lindsay Zogas on Vimeo.

I lost 23 pounds in 10 days. Thanks, Trimspa!

Thanks to having a baby, blood loss and breastfeeding, I've lost 23 pounds since Oliver's birth. I thought maybe I'd get a good 15 off but 23 is awesome. Only 19 more and I'll be at my pre-pregnancy weight. I'm sure I won't LOOK the same as I did before (my belly is sooo squishy now!) but I'm ok with that. It's a weird thing to say, but I feel like a mom, and have the battle wounds to show it!

What a cutie!

Oliver being cute from Lindsay Zogas on Vimeo.

Oliver is almost a week old!

At 12:16am, Oliver will be one week old. It's amazing how fast a week has gone. The days tend to blend together right now since we're not on a normal sleep schedule. The first two nights home, Oliver was fantastic. He was a bit fussy at the hospital so we were nervous he'd be the same way here. But he was great and we thought he just felt comfortable and safe at his new home. We even started telling people how lucky we were that our little guy was a good sleeper! Definitely jinxed ourselves on that one... The past two nights have been a little crazy. He is super fussy and the only thing that calms him down is to breastfeed, and he needs it almost every hour. We can't imagine he's actually hungry but he won't take the pacifier, and no amount of swaddling, bouncing, rocking or singing will help calm him down. So we put him on the boob, and he is good to go. Sometimes it knocks him out, other times he's wide awake. But if he does fall asleep, it's for 45 minutes to an hour, max. And the next morning, it's like he finally gives in and sleeps for a few hours. This morning he finally fell asleep at 7:30, and I woke up at 10:30 feeling refreshed. It's amazing how little sleep I can run on right now! Even though it's been a bit of an emotional roller coaster, it's so worth it. John and I have been very honest with each other, expressing our fears and admitting how we REALLY feel about things. I'm not ashamed to say that I've said more than once that I miss our old life, and how easy it was just the two of us. John feels frustrated that he can't soothe his crying baby, and that it's up to me to stay up all night and comfort him. There are so many things running through our minds, but then Oliver will open his eyes and stare at us and all we can do is coo over how cute he is, and how amazing our life is now. We wouldn't trade this in for anything, and each day it gets better. Each day he feels like less of an intruder and more a part of our family. John reminded me today that not only are we getting to know him, but he's still getting to know us. We have to continue to have patience and remind each other that the rough nights will soon become a thing of the past. We'll experience all sorts of other crazy things (can't wait until he starts teething!!!!) but if we can get through this, we can do anything. All I know is that I feel so blessed to be married to such a strong man who is not afraid to admit when he is scared or frustrated or overwhelmed, but can still love and nurture as if nothing was wrong. Thank God for our families, who are always here for us whether in person or through emails and texts, to tell us they love us and are thinking about us. And our friends who check in on us, ask if we need anything, offer to bring dinner, or just tell us how cute our kid is :) We are fortunate that my milk supply is plentiful and that my body is healing extremely well from the cesarean, so I have the food to nurture and sooth my baby and the energy to do so. We are so lucky and know things could be a lot worse in many different ways. No matter how many weird thoughts come and go, the one thing we know is that we can't imagine life without Oliver!

Taking a nap in his crib!

Oliver's birth story

Finally I've had time to finish this! I've been a little preoccupied with the cutest little baby ever :)

As I posted last week, we went into L&D on Saturday the 5th for a non-stress test. During the test, nurse Shannon told me what to look for as signs that labor was about to begin. I listened to her but in the back of my mind thought, "There's no way this kid is coming out before the induction." We went home that morning and a little while later something came over me and I thought that maybe this was the day... I hadn't shown any signs, but just had a gut feeling that my labor would start anytime. So a few hours later around 4:20pm while John and I were taking a lovely afternoon nap, I felt the first contraction. At first I didn't know if that's what it was, because it wasn't how people described it. It just felt like a really intense menstrual cramp that lasted for about 30 seconds. 15 minutes later, there was another one. Then an hour later, 2 more at 15 minutes apart. At 6:00, the intensity grew. I wrote this blog post at that time, but didn't post it:

I think I'm in early labor! I'm not going to post this entry until after the fact, in case I'm wrong. But since about 4:20 today, I've been having early labor contractions. They are about 14 minutes apart, lasting 30-60 seconds. They were very mild at first, and now are getting more intense. It's all in my lower abdomen, and they feel just like horrible menstrual cramps. Then when the contraction is over, I'm fine. Like right now, I feel great. So we'll see how this develops overnight! It could be nothing, or could go on for a few days, there is just no telling. On another note, John is proving to be the best coach ever. Right as one of my last really painful contractions started and I began to panic, John grabbed my hands and reminded me to breathe. He started breathing with me and brought me back to reality. I'm so incredibly lucky for this man!
* * *
After I wrote that, the mild cramps became more uncomfortable, enough that I just couldn't ignore the pain anymore. John and I were watching the Blazer game, playing Scrabble, and I took a long bath to keep myself occupied, but soon those things weren't keeping me distracted. Contractions started coming every 10 minutes, then 8, 6... At the same time, I had some flu-like symptoms which I was also warned about. Let me just say... Not fun. At 11pm, they were 5 minutes apart, 1 minute long and had been that way for an hour. OHMYGOD, that's the 5-1-1 rule they taught us in childbirth prep class! When that happens, you have the green light to go to the hospital. So I called Labor & Delivery, told the nurse what was happening, and she said to me in an excited voice, "Ok Lindsay, are you ready to come to the hospital?" Was I ready? I've had my bags packed for weeks!! Yes, I am ready, so let's get this show on the road! John, with the largest smile I have ever seen in my life, rushed around the place making sure he got everything he needed while I sat on the couch breathing and cussing my way through the pain. Finally we had everything together and left the house. We decided not to make any phone calls to family or friends until we got there and knew what was happening, since we had no idea how far along I was. Early labor can last for hours or DAYS, and with our luck I was sure I was in it for the long haul.

We arrived at L&D and were brought to a room where I was checked and told I was dilated to a close 2cm. BUMMER. Nurse Stefanie told us to walk around for a couple of hours in hopes that I would progress more and be able to be admitted into the hospital. So, we walked around the hospital... And walked... And walked... For what seemed like days, was only an hour and 15 minutes. I was so uncomfortable and just felt that there HAD to be progress! We made our way back to L&D and Stefanie checked me again. Sorry, no cervical change at all. We then had 2 options– go home with a couple of Ambien sleeping pills to sleep through the night, then see how things progress at home. Or, stay at the hospital and receive a "drug cocktail", a nice shot in the butt of morphine and something else to let me sleep and I'd likely wake up at 4cm. We opted to stay, in hopes that we wouldn't leave L&D AGAIN without a baby. Stefanie said there's a small chance the drug wouldn't work but that would be rare. I was excited for some relief and rest! She said to push the call button if it didn't work and she'd try something else. So I got the shot and right away felt sleepy. John settled into the cot next to me and we both fell fast asleep. About 5 minutes later, I woke up to the same excruciating pain in my uterus. Um excuse me, wasn't I supposed to be able to sleep through these?? After the contraction was over, I reached for the call button but was so groggy that I couldn't see it, and suddenly fell asleep again. Another few minutes later, I woke up to another strong contraction! And again reached for the call button, but passed out before I could make it. This continued on for a good 5 hours, and I was miserable. At 8:00 in the morning John woke up (well rested, lucky guy!) and I called the nurse in to check me. What was the verdict? 3cm. AAAH!! There was no way I had been going through that much pain to be only that far along. I was so tired and in pain but tried to stay hopeful. Midwife Karen Parker Linn was on call over the weekend, and came in to discuss the options at this point. She said if I stayed at the hospital any longer, they'd have to do some things to help me progress. Meaning pitocin, which didn't sound like any fun at the time. Or, we could go home and labor on my own for awhile. We all decided together that the best plan was to go home. Again. Without a baby. Ugh! They gave me some Ambien and I planned to take it as soon as I got home to sleep through the day.

An hour and 2 Ambien later, I was unable to sleep in my own bed. And my contractions were worse than ever! I was miserable and told John around 5pm that we had to go back. This just wasn't right and I couldn't tolerate it any longer! We got to the hospital and the nurses recognized us and said, "We thought we'd see you a few hours ago!" Got into yet another hospital room, another cervical check and I was barely at 4cm. I was about to lose it. I had been laboring for 28 hours at this point, was in SO much pain and just exhausted. At the rate I was going they thought I'd have the baby the next day, in the morning if I got lucky. Did I really have it in me to go another 12+ hours? How badly did I want to stick to my natural birth plan? I cried and told John how sorry I was, but just didn't think I could do it any longer. He comforted me and assured me that he understood, and was proud of how far I had gone. At 7pm, I finally got some relief and received an epidural, and Karen also broke my water. That was the weirdest feeling! It was like I had peed all over myself. Very odd. At 9:15, Karen checked me and I was still 4cm, 100% effaced, and the baby was a -2 station, meaning he hadn't dropped all the way (still!) The best next step was to start pitocin to get those contractions moving along in hopes of having a baby at some point in my life.

For the next couple of hours, the nurses were in and out of our room, turning up the pitocin every 30 minutes. Around 11:30pm, she came in to turn it down. Karen then came in to explain why... She showed us on the monitors that after each pitocin-induced contraction, the baby's heart rate would drop. This would be considered normal if it were happening DURING the contraction, but because it was after it was telling them that he wasn't tolerating the drug at all. At this point, I still needed to dilate 6 more cm, the baby had to drop, he was posterior, and he'd have to endure a couple hours of pushing. In Karen's 36 years doing what she does, she saw this happen over and over again, and the best thing to do would be to get the baby out as soon as possible... Meaning, it was time to talk c-section. At this point, I was ready to have my baby in my arms, and John and I agreed that this would be best for him. Dr. Grant wasn't on call that weekend, so another doctor would have to deliver the baby. But Karen had called her anyway to tell her what was happening, and Dr. Grant said that she would drop what she was doing to be there for us! I felt so great knowing she would be the one delivering the baby, and felt even better about the decision. Karen then said she would arrive in about 30 minutes and we'd get going. Um, what? In half an hour I'll be having a baby?!?!? AAH!! Finally, it was time. I wasn't scared at all and felt so good about our experience. I labored naturally for 28 hours with John by my side. He coached me through each contraction, holding my hands, massaging my back, swaying back and forth, breathing along with me. He reminded me to relax and that soon enough it would all be over, and we'd finally have our baby. I felt so close to him, and I knew the decisions we made were all in the best interest of our son.

Dr. Grant arrived at the hospital, gave us a hug and said she'd see us in the OR. They gave John a set of scrubs, upped my epidural, and wheeled us in to the operating room. The team of nurses, Dr. Grant and Karen got to work quickly, but before starting they turned on music... Christmas music! Hello, did they know me or what?! What's better than listening to Ingrid Michaelson's "Winter Song" as my baby is being delivered? After what seemed like hours, at 12:16am on December 7, 2009, I heard the most amazing sound I will ever hear in my life... The first cry coming from Oliver Robert Zogas. I burst into tears (and am crying now as I write this!) and couldn't believe that after all these years of dreaming about my baby, he was finally here. Separated from me by a blue curtain, just moments away of showing his little face, I continued to cry. John, who was seated right behind me, cried, too, and caught this all on video.

(Disclaimer: They let him tape the baby during the cesarean as he was being delivered, so there are blood and guts at one point!)

The Birth of Oliver from Lindsay Zogas on Vimeo.

Our worlds have changed forever and we couldn't be happier. John has amazed me in more ways than I ever thought possible... He is an incredible father already, constantly rocking and soothing and loving our baby. At the hospital he changed every single diaper, because he wanted to and was excited that he got to do that for his child. He was by my side during every feeding, so he could help me position the pillows and "shoosh" the baby to calm him down while I was trying to figure out how to breastfeed. At home he has been even more amazing, and I have never felt so blessed in my life as I do right now. Life is so very, very good.

Busy day!

This morning we had a follow-up visit with a Providence lactation consultant to make sure breastfeeding was going well. I'm still using a nipple shield (a fake plastic nipple that fits over my real one) since Oliver wouldn't take the real deal at the hospital, and I'm hoping to get rid of that. Suzanne the LC said to use it for awhile longer as long as things were going well, and after a few weeks we can wean him off of it. But the kid is getting plenty of nutrition and my supply is definitely there, so we are doing well! We also saw Dr. Bengston for the first time in his office to check up on little Oliver. It was a quick visit just to check him out and make sure things were going well. We weighed him and he's already back to 8 lbs., 11 oz! We left the hospital with him at 8 lbs. 3 oz. Dr. B said he checked out great and we'll see him on the 21st for his 2-week check up.

Going home!

We are heading home today! Check out our huge carseat for our tiny baby :)

Stay tuned!

Yay for babies! We are absolutely in love with our little Oliver and can't imagine life without him. I'll post more pics and the birth story soon, but for now take a peek at the photo of the day that has already made me cry twice:


John is an amazing dad and has so much love to give this baby. I am so lucky to be married to such a loving, nurturing man! Ok I might cry again... One more picture to tie you over. HE IS SO CUTE!!!!!!

CAN I GET AN AMEN!?!?!

He's here!!!

On December 7, 2009 at 12:16am, our worlds changed forever. Welcome to the world, Oliver Robert Zogas!

8 lbs., 12 oz. • length 21.25" • head 14.5"

Things are Changing...

I can't believe that in probably less than 12 hours, I'm going to be a dad....Just a short post for now, but there are so many details to be explained later. Long story short...contractions, lindsay hurting, more contractions, more hurting, game of scrabble, john wins, john is awesome, more contractions, hospital, sleep, home, ambien, no sleep for lindsay, more contractions, back to hospital, 4 centimeters dilated, epidural placed, bag broke, pitocin started, no more pain for lindsay.....phew....this will be a long post later, I can assure you of that. The main point to get across, is that I now can comprehend why women were meant to do this, and men were not...I'd be done in 2 minutes...load me up with drugs!! Lindsay is so amazingly strong and although having to watch her go through something that I have no control over has been difficult, it has been inspiring to see just how much of a mother she is ready to be. I don't cry much unless I've been hurt in the special place, but I'm pretty sure once that baby comes out, I'm going be a wreck. I'm so happy that I have someone as special as Lindsay to go through this part of life with, and I've never been more ready for what lies ahead :)

A trip to Labor & Delivery...

...where we once again left without our baby! We went in this morning for a schedule non-stress test, and ended up in the same room where we had our external version. This visit was more relaxing though! All they wanted was to monitor the baby's heartbeat for a good 20 minutes to make sure he's doing ok in there now that I'm 8 days overdue. Once again our little one proved to be a bit of a rascal... The L&D nurse, Shannon, couldn't find his heartbeat right away. When she finally got it, the baby would move. She chased him around for a bit and finally got a good reading. For this type of thing they'd normally strap the monitor on me and leave the room for awhile, but each time she'd move her hand the baby would move away! What a stinker. So she sat with us to make sure she could get a solid reading, which she did, and everything looks great. I also had the contraction monitor on me and got to see that I am having regular Braxton Hicks contractions that I just can't feel. That was comforting to know that things are in fact moving along down there. So even though we didn't get to leave the hospital with our baby, we are thrilled he is happy and safe in his little home! Even though we desperately want him out, John and I are so glad to know he's doing so well in there. Only a few more days though, kiddo... Tuesday morning you are being evicted!

My birth plan

As our induction date gets closer, I've become a little more anxious about labor and delivery. I've had a birth plan in mind since before I even got pregnant, and even though part of that plan includes being flexible to change, I never really considered that I may have to be induced. And depending how things go, that could lead to the exact opposite experience I'm hoping for. In my ideal world, I would go into labor on my own. I'd labor at home for awhile, then head to the hospital when things were progressing. I'd utilize all sorts of pain management techniques that John and I have learned (breathing, massage, etc.), walk around L&D a ton to help the progression, hop in the jacuzzi tub, and do everything I could to avoid pain medication. When I've told people my plan, some think I'm nuts. They want to know why on earth would I pass up an epidural? Do I have any idea how painful childbirth is? Am I crazy? The thing is, I think modern medicine is amazing and I have nothing against it. I'm also very much aware that my plan could go to shit the second I go into labor and I'll be begging every person that walks by to please hook me up with some drugs. But I've just wanted the chance to TRY to labor on my own, without pitocin pumping through my body making me contract, or an epi or narcotics making the pain disappear. In one of the books I read, someone compared childbirth to a root canal. Would you ever walk into a dentist office and turn down the anesthesia and pain medication for that type of procedure? No way! So why is childbirth different? Epidurals were invented for a reason– to put women out of their misery during a very long and painful experience. However, each woman responds to labor (and pain in general) differently, and there's just no telling how I'll handle it. I owe it to myself and our baby to give it a try the natural way.

Now that I am 8 days overdue and have tried several natural inducers that are not working, I don't really know what to feel. My body isn't responding to these things because it's not ready. I've obviously progressed a little over the past few weeks, so it's getting there. But I'm not even having contractions (at least that I can feel), so who knows when/if labor would start on its own. I could ask my doctor to wait until 42 weeks to induce me, assuming my fluid levels were ok to go that long. I'd have a better chance of going into labor on my own and having the natural childbirth experience I've dreamed of. But at this point, I am so drained and just want my baby here. My belly is tight and itchy from the skin stretching out more than it should. It hurts to lay down, it hurts to walk, and it REALLY hurts to stand or sit up. I am exhausted throughout the day but can't stay asleep at night, I have acid reflux after every meal, and I'm peeing every 20 minutes. My body is not my own, and I want it back. NOW. But more than this, I just want my baby in my arms. I want to bring him home, to watch John cuddle him, to see our friends and family love him. To go on walks, to mommy & me groups, tummy time on the living room floor, to nurse him in our amazingly comfortable glider, and change his little diapers. We are days away from beginning these experiences, and it just feels like torture having to wait this long. So as much as I've wanted to go the natural route, I have to trust my doctor that an induction will be necessary if he doesn't show up on his own before Tuesday. Once they start the pitocin Tuesday morning, I'm going to see how my body reacts and if I can handle it without any drugs. "The Pit" as it's called makes contractions longer and stronger, so I can't imagine it being any fun. Also I'd have to have it hooked up to me at all times, which means I wouldn't be as free to walk around, and I'm pretty sure they won't allow me to go in the jacuzzi tub to help deal with the pain. How successful would I be at natural childbirth if I'm confined to a bed? Probably not at all. Anyway, these are all just thoughts I have running through my head as I prepare for the most intense and amazing experience in my life. There is no telling what our labor and delivery will be like, so even though I have ideas in my head, I have to go in with an open mind. All I want is a healthy baby and a healthy mama, so however that is accomplished will be just fine!

Week 41: An even bigger baby

How your baby's growing:

A bit over 20 inches long, your baby has continued to grow and may now weigh almost 8 pounds. As cozy as he is, your baby can't stay inside you forever. For your baby's safety, your practitioner will talk with you about inducing labor if your baby isn't born in the next week — earlier if there are any problems. Most practitioners won't let you wait more than two weeks past your due date to give birth because it puts you and your baby at increased risk for complications. About 5 to 6 percent of women have prolonged pregnancies that extend three or more weeks beyond their estimated due dates. Babies born at 42 weeks and beyond can have dry parchment-like skin and are often overweight. Waiting that long to deliver also increases your chance of developing an infection in your uterus that could be dangerous for your baby or of having a stillbirth. What's more, your labor is more likely to be prolonged or stalled, both you and your baby have an increased risk of injury during a vaginal delivery, and you double your chances of needing a c-section.

A little more progress...

I post this update with a bit of hesitance but feel like it's important to document– I'm losing my mucus plug! I won't go into detail except it's exactly how it's described online. Kinda gross, but hey, it's all part of this process. And what's the best part about it?? It means PROGRESS! Some people go into labor right after losing their plug, while it still takes awhile for others. I'm still thinking we're in this for the long haul, but who knows!

Christmas time is here!

Can you believe it's December?! I put up a few Christmas decorations the day after Thanksgiving and it just felt weird. We normally don't decorate that early but I needed to keep busy, and I figured it would be nice to have it done in case the baby decided to show up. Today is John's last day off work before he works another 4 (or less, again if baby comes!) so we decided to get our Christmas tree. Last year we made a huge mess dragging a tree into our condo building and there were pine needles everywhere. What a pain to clean! So I prepared by buying a huge tree disposal bag that we could put the tree in and it would catch all the needles. We went to the same lot as last year a couple miles away (http://www.larche-portland.org/tree-sale.htm) and found a 7' noble that looked so perfect. We (meaning, John and our friend's dad, Peter Lax, of all people who was volunteering there!) tossed it on top of the car, tied it up nice and tight, and hit the road. I asked John before we took off, "Do you think the knots are nice and tight?" With an annoying look on his face, John sighed and said, "YES, Lindsay." We began to drive and got about 5 blocks before we suddenly saw the tree slipping off the side of the car! We pulled over real quick and got out only to find the rope actually WASN'T tied that tight. I started laughing as John said, "Well babe this may be a good time to tell you that I'm not really the best at tying knots." So what to do? Well, our only real option for the rest of the short ride was to stick it INSIDE the car. Thank God for that disposal bag! We shoved the tree in the back seat and let it hang outside the window. As we were doing this, I was laughing so hard I nearly peed my pants! We are such city kids and here we are with this huge tree on the side of the road, my big belly in the way so I couldn't really do much but laugh, and our only solution to the problem was to shove it inside our tiny Honda Civic. Thankfully we got the thing back here without any more trouble, and it looks beautiful. We only have lights on it right now but I'll take a picture when it's complete. But for now, here is a shot of John and his handy work.

I love you, babe, and your quick thinking!

1cm!

THANK GOD, we have progress! It's not much but enough to make me really happy. At today's appointment (which is our last one before having the baby!) we started out with the usual listening of the heartbeat. Dr. Grant has never had an easy time finding it because our kiddo likes to play hide and seek with her. Today was the worst though– she'd find it, then he'd give a little kick and move away. She chased him around for a few minutes and would get snippets of the heartbeat but he wouldn't stay still for her. She laughed at one point saying he was "sassing" her by kicking in one spot and then moving. Not my child! :) Anyway, his heartbeat started out normal then a few minutes later was going really fast, which she said was great because it meant he was doing just fine and being extremely active. We then moved onto another lovely cervical exam, which started out by her saying she didn't think he had dropped much more. But she stopped herself and said, "Wait, I can feel his head and– oh, oh! I think you've dilated a little bit! You're at 1 cm." John and I gave each other a high five and I felt so relieved. Dr. Grant then told us most first time moms deliver between 40.5 and 41.5 weeks, so this is great progress. And even if he doesn't show up this week and we still have to go in to be induced, at least we won't be starting from zero. My cervix is still pretty thick and long but you never know what can happen this week. So the plan is to go into L&D next Monday at 5pm and have a drug called cervidil inserted which will ripen the cervix. The next morning they'll start the pitocin, and we'll just go from there. Sometimes, cervidil can kick start contractions if the body is ready so we may get lucky and not even need anymore drugs. Or, pitocin can get my body going and they can turn it down if my body takes over. OR, I'll be on the drugs the entire time if things don't progress. We'll just take it however it comes and hope for the best!

In the meantime we are continuing with our natural inducers/aides of raspberry leaf tea, evening primrose oil capsules, "intercourse" as everyone around the doctor's office oh-so-officially call it, walking, bouncing on the birthing ball, and today's latest purchase, blue & black cohosh.


My friend Meghan took it and had her baby a day later, so we're giving it a shot! It tastes nasty but maybe we'll get lucky and I'll only have to take it a few times :)