The No-Cry Sleep Solution

The first 2 weeks after we brought Oliver home were pretty rough. The biggest problem for John and I? Sleep deprivation! Everything is so much worse when you're exhausted. So we quickly realized that we had to get the baby sleeping at night if we ever wanted to function normally. The whole "sleep when they sleep" during the day thing is garbage. When would I check email, do laundry, take a shower, eat a meal, or catch up on my TV shows?! I know, I know– you're not supposed to do any of those things when you have a new baby. But for me, I really needed to do those things as it kept me sane. If all I did was sleep and nurse my newborn, I'd go crazy! So if I got sleep at night, then all would be well in the world. This didn't look very promising the first couple of weeks as Oliver slept in our room. He made a lot of noise during sleep, all of which I thought were his way of asking for my help. John would tell me over and over again to leave him alone, but I just HAD to peek over the side of the cradle and touch him or pick him up so he knew I was here if he needed me. That usually woke him up and then he'd cry and the only thing I knew how to do was nurse him back to sleep. So then I'd turn the light on and wake John up and I was awake, and once again we're losing sleep. After the cradle didn't seem to work well, I thought having him in our bed would be better (HA!) The snuggle nest took up so much room that John and I were both squished and practically hanging off our sides of the bed, while tiny Oliver was super comfortable in the middle, STILL not sleeping soundly. Finally John convinced me to put him in his crib and like I mentioned in a past blog post, I am SO glad we did that. John was right, I was wrong! Oliver slept better and we slept better. Thank God. After 3 or 4 weeks, he started sleeping a 4-6 hour stretch after we first put him down at night, then after nursing him he'd go down for another 2-3 hours. This was great and I always woke up feeling like I had gotten good sleep. That is until the past two nights... I put him to bed at 11pm, and didn't hear a peep until 6am. HOLY CRAP I haven't felt so refreshed and well-rested since before I got pregnant! I still woke up a few times throughout the night and got up to check on him, but still felt like I had completely uninterrupted sleep. I have no idea how long we can expect this to last, but even if it was just the past 2 nights, I feel like I've finally caught up on lost sleep since having a baby.

So why and how is Oliver sleeping so well? It could just be the kid is that tired and would sleep like this no matter what we did. But I also think we're helping him by creating the right mood at night. I started reading a book called The No-Cry Sleep Solution by Elizabeth Pantley which is really good to help older babies and toddlers sleep for longer stretches without having them cry it out. I realized we're already practicing some of her methods which could be why he sleeps so well. At night, we keep the lights low and volume down in the living room when we're all in there hanging out. We change him into pajamas, and the past week we've warmed up a bottle of milk to feed him in the glider in his room. We like the bottle feedings because we can tell exactly how much he's taking in– sometimes during breast feeding he falls asleep and I'm not sure if I should wake him up to keep eating, or if he's fallen asleep because he's full! After he's done eating, we swaddle him (which wakes him up a bit), give him a pacifier, turn on the womb sounds and lights go off. He'll lie awake in the crib for 15-20 minutes, sometimes making noises but not crying. And then... He falls asleep on his own! A couple weeks ago, I hated putting him down awake and felt bad that he was just lying there while I went into my own bed to try to fall asleep. But it's what we're supposed to do! Dr. Bengtson told us at our first pediatrician visit that it's good to put them to bed before a deep sleep so they see where they are. If they wake up soon after, they'll look around and realize they're in their sleepy spot, and can put themselves back to sleep. I trust Dr. B, but still felt uneasy about this... Until I realized he's right. Oliver won't wake up crying until he's hungry and needs us, which doesn't happen until he's been asleep for 4-7 hours. It's awesome and I can only hope this pattern will continue!